Well, all of that aside, let's start with today's failure. Prevention has a handy little workout on their site that I (surprise) found on Pinterest. LOVE YOUR LOWER BODY screamed out at me, so I pinned it and decided to get around to giving it a go today. It promises: "Flatten your belly, slim your thighs, and firm your butt in 2 weeks—without a single sit-up or squat!"
Flatten, slim and firm, no sit-ups or squats? Hell yeah! After carrying three baby boys in my abdomen in the span of 5 years, there isn't much south of my eyebrows that couldn't use a bit of all three. I've managed to shed about 15 pounds with just some calorie watching, but the last 10 is really kicking my (decidedly unfirm) butt.
So, I prep my workout area, do a little stretching, and get on the floor, ready to start firming up the jiggly goodness below my waistline.
Prevention doesn't account for a houseful of evil babies who want mommy to stay fat and ashamed - because it means I will spend hours in the kitchen baking delicious things to stuff my anguish down with, while they also enjoy my chocolately inner demon food. I had no more pressed a foot against the wall when my two year old came flying out of nowhere, landing WWF style on my face. The leg of my glasses spun off, my eyes filled up with tears, and I just lay there for a moment, dazed. I may or may not have a black eye come tomorrow.
After sending him off with a swatted bottom and a healthy dose of guilt, I threw my glasses across the room, laid back down, and slowly raised one foot the wall, then the other, gave a peek to ensure no one was going to come flying at my head, and began to raise my lower body.
I don't know what I looked like, and I'm pretty thankful for that, but I am completely certain that my body wasn't forming a "nearly straight line from chest to knees". Unless a straight line consists of my feet sliding slowly up while my body spaghetti noodled around and I breathed all stalker-calling style into my own chest.
At this point, I was interrupted by my 5 year old yelling about using too much toilet paper, and I had to bolt in the bathroom pretty quickly to ensure I wouldn't have to have RotoRooter out to my house, so the rest of the workout is on pause until I can find some alone time to do it without one of my kids snapping into my face like a Slim Jim...
On another note, I am trying 2 new Pinterest recipes tonight, so I'll have a new post up with what I hope are success stories regarding them.
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